After every trauma my ocd get worse and worse. Every little thing i do become something wrong that can be dangerous for my family. Or i feel like i don’t deserve to be happy because instead would be happen something bad.
Sometimes i feel really alone and the only one that never leave me is my brain. When i was a child i talked very little. I maked friends with other kids that were super extrovert because they talked for me too, i had only to listen and follow them everywhere, but is not a good friendship.
Is really difficult find an equilibrium with bipolar disorder, especially with the mixed type that I have, but with the new pills i stopped eat at night, the impulse is less strong and now i can control myself, thing that i could’t do before.
In the last week i had very high pressure. The doctor never told me i had to take under control my pressure and with my bad memory i never did it. So now i take under control that (is very high when i’m anxious, so almost always) and my weight, the night i started eat a little less and sometimes i don’t eat at all, … Continue reading High pressure (in anyway)
I was under a low dose of lithium for the fact that cause me a lot of acne, but recent i had more than 30 mood swing a day, bad mood swing, rage for more. So i decide to take more lithium and accept acne. Honestly i prefer calm my brain than have less acne. Continue reading “More acne, but less mood swing”
Today i had the visit in front of a commission because, like i talk about in the this post, i asked for an help. I was in a state of anxiety and panick for a week, because of the visit, but has been super fast, just some questions about how i feel and my difficulties in life. I sayd them that i was in total … Continue reading Disability Benefits with bipolar disorder
// Attention! Trigger self-harm
🎇❤ Happy New Year! From Italy to all, i hope can be a good year! Continue reading 🎇
I wish a Merry Christmas and happy holidays to all! If you celebrate or not i hope this days can be good and full of joy for you.
Today i go again to my psychiatrist, for talk about i can’t sleep and i have attack of rage without a reason. Apparently after like 2 years that i’m diagnosed the doctor find out i don’t have bipolar type 2 but the type 3, the mixed one, so instead of be “happy” in the mania time i’m depressed and angry. Greeeeat. Continue reading Not 2, but 3