Sometimes i feel really alone and the only one that never leave me is my brain. When i was a child i talked very little. I maked friends with other kids that were super extrovert because they talked for me too, i had only to listen and follow them everywhere, but is not a good friendship.
Is really difficult find an equilibrium with bipolar disorder, especially with the mixed type that I have, but with the new pills i stopped eat at night, the impulse is less strong and now i can control myself, thing that i could’t do before.
In the last week i had very high pressure. The doctor never told me i had to take under control my pressure and with my bad memory i never did it. So now i take under control that (is very high when i’m anxious, so almost always) and my weight, the night i started eat a little less and sometimes i don’t eat at all, … Continue reading High pressure (in anyway)
Today i had the visit in front of a commission because, like i talk about in the this post, i asked for an help. I was in a state of anxiety and panick for a week, because of the visit, but has been super fast, just some questions about how i feel and my difficulties in life. I sayd them that i was in total … Continue reading Disability Benefits with bipolar disorder
Today i go again to my psychiatrist, for talk about i can’t sleep and i have attack of rage without a reason. Apparently after like 2 years that i’m diagnosed the doctor find out i don’t have bipolar type 2 but the type 3, the mixed one, so instead of be “happy” in the mania time i’m depressed and angry. Greeeeat. Continue reading Not 2, but 3
Two resolutions done before the end of the year, 20 books reading challenge complete! ✔️ and some are really big books. I love reading, but is really difficult when you have issue with memory and concentration, so i’m proud of myself for this challenge. For the next year i wanna read at least 25 books, i feel motiveted, plus do this means go outside everytime for go … Continue reading Another resolution done: 20 books (victory #6)
And all i loved. I loved alone -Poe Yes, everytime i’m the one who care, listen, understand, have patience, but others don’t do the same for me, never. I’m very lonely, but at the same time i know all my relationship end for the same problem, i give 100 and others give me 10. Of course the bipolar disorder doesn’t help, but i was sure … Continue reading All i loved.
Today i was outside for a walk with my sister and we saw a puppy alone with the collar, but without a plate with a name or something. The collar didn’t have the leash so i used the belt of my purse and the doggy guided us to his house. An old lady was sweeping the leaves and she didn’t notice that the gate was … Continue reading I saved another doggy
This days aren’t the best, some people that i care are sick so i’m very worried for them, but Halloween is a good way for distract myself a little. I have done a make up inspired from the character “Alice Angel” from the game “Bendy And The Ink Machine”
Today i went at the comics & manga’s fair with my sister and her two friends. I was a little anxious for my social phobia but is went all ok, i had fun. The depression was there all time in the background of my brain, but i simply ignored it.